Tool or Teaser?

February 25, 2026 Jessica Lovett

A No-Guilt Guide to Screen Time in Your Homeschool

Someone recently asked me if I feel guilty letting my kids use a screen during school time. I had Spotify playing, a graphic I was designing open on my laptop, and a Google Meet music lesson coming up in twenty minutes. So.

I made another cup of coffee and thought: we have to talk about this.

Because here’s the truth: I pay my property taxes online. I Google Meet my kids’ music lessons and video call family I love. I have Spotify running on continuous loop because, frankly, I would be a terrible Luddite and silence is not my friend. I design graphics, use the internet to plan field trips, and I’ve spent a genuinely happy afternoon setting up protected networks for my kids. [see this post] As I’m trying this, I hear my daughter doing an algebra lesson video, coordinating with her on-paper curriculum, but the video explainer is online, nonetheless.

I check the weather to see if we’ll get drenched by unpredictable Texas rain before we even make it out of the car at our destination.

The screen is not the enemy.

And I am, as Captain Jack Sparrow would say, more of a guidelines person than a rigidly follow all the rules kinda person.

Therefore, I am the last one who should be handing you another rigid set of rules — so I won’t. What I will give you is a framework.

But I also know what it looks like when a child is being used by a screen instead of using it. You’ve seen it. The glazed-over eyes. The short fuse when you say it’s time to stop, like a puppy who doesn’t want to give you the ball to fetch again. The forty-five minutes that vanished into some autoplay abyss while the sun was outside just waiting.

So I want to offer you something today. Not a rigid screen-free manifesto. Not a guilt trip. Just a simple framework I’ve started using in our home that has completely changed the conversation.

I call it the Tool vs. Teaser Test.

What Does “Screen-Free” Actually Mean in Real Life?

Let’s clear something up right away, because the phrase “screen-free homeschooling” can send a mom into a spiral of anxiety faster than a surprise co-op cancellation via text, halfway to the building.

Digital intentionality — not digital elimination — is the real goal. In 2026, that distinction matters more than ever. The research on active versus passive screen time is pretty clear: what your child does on a screen matters far more than how long they’re on it.

A child who spends thirty minutes designing a birthday card for her grandmother on a creative platform is building artistic skills, practicing decision-making, and creating something with genuine meaning. A child who spends thirty minutes clicking a repetitive mobile game is… well. Just clicking buttons.

Same device. Completely different experience.

The goal isn’t a screen-free life. It’s a life where you are the boss of the machine — not the other way around.

This is your permission slip, friend. You are allowed to use technology. You are allowed to let your kids use technology. The question worth asking isn’t “how much?” — it’s “to what end?”

The Tool vs. Teaser Framework

I started thinking about this the day my daughter asked to use the computer. I was about to say yes automatically — and then I stopped and thought about why she wanted it. Was she going somewhere intentional, or just… drifting?

That moment gave me the framework. Every screen interaction in our home now falls into one of two categories.

🛠️ It’s a Tool if…

It has a “done” point. You get on, accomplish the task, and get off. The bill is paid. The email is sent. The design is exported. There’s a finish line.
It creates something real. Your child is making a shirt design, writing a story, composing music, or building a presentation. They are producing, not just consuming.
It solves a specific problem. You’re using a plant identification app to figure out what’s growing in the backyard. You’re doing the taxes on Turbotax (which I did yesterday, blarg). There’s a clear reason.
It builds genuine connection. A video call with a grandparent. A shared apologetics podcast listened to with a child. A collaborative project done together. The screen is a bridge to something real, not a destination.
The brain is “on.” The child is engaged, making choices, figuring something out. There’s a spark of curiosity or effort there — you can see it on their face.

🎢 It’s a Teaser if…

The scroll never ends. If there’s no natural stopping point built into the app — autoplay, infinite feed, “just one more level” — it’s designed to hold attention, not serve it.
It’s running from boredom, not toward something. “I’m bored” is a checking out of life and can be a habit! Downtime is where creativity can live! Using a screen to fill every quiet moment short-circuits that beautiful, productive discomfort where ideas happen.
The zombie stare appears. Minimal blinking. Slight mouth-breathing. High irritability when interrupted. If you recognize this, you recognize a Teaser.
The digital world is the destination. Not a tool to get somewhere — just a place to exist, passively, while real life waits outside.

“Are we using this as a tool to create something — or are we just looking for a teaser because we’re bored?”

That question has become something like a household phrase around here. It sounds simple, but it has opened up some genuinely wonderful conversations about purpose, creativity, and what we actually want to do with our time.

Subscribe to get access to my printable library and download your own Tool or Teaser checklist!

Three Tool-Based Projects to Try This Week

Because I am, above all things, a practical person who knows you need something to actually do with this framework, here are three ideas to get you started. All of them use screens. All of them are solidly in Tool territory.

1. Design Something Real

Let your child design a T-shirt, a birthday card, a poster for their bedroom door, or a logo for an imaginary business. Or make a real business happen! Free creative platforms are incredibly robust these days, and the skills involved — layout, color theory, typography, decision-making — are legitimately educational. I recommend using Canva, where you can design and print all in one program. When the design is done, print it or save it. Done point achieved.

2. The Grandparent Interview

Hand a child a device with a voice memo app and a list of five questions. Send them to call, video chat, or voice-message a grandparent, elderly neighbor, or family friend. Ask about their childhood. Their favorite memory. What the world looked like when they were young. What it was like to wait a week to know what happens next in a favorite show!

This is oral history. This is connection. This is a Tool doing exactly what it should be doing — building a bridge between generations.

3. The Backyard Field Guide

For my Texas mamas especially: take a plant or bird identification app outside. Spend twenty minutes in the backyard identifying what’s actually growing and living there. Look it up. Write it down. Sketch it if you want.

You’ve just covered nature study, research skills, and — depending on how you document it — writing. The screen was a tool. The learning happened in the sunshine.

The Tool vs. Teaser Checklist

Before the screen comes out — for you or for the kids — run through these five questions. You don’t need all five to be “yes” for something to count as a Tool. But they’ll help you feel it out.

Does it have a specific goal? “I’m going to design a shirt for my sister’s birthday” is a goal. “I’m just going to look at YouTube until dinner” is not.
Is it active or passive? Is the child making choices, creating, solving? Or leaning back while the algorithm serves up the next thing?
Is there a “done” point? When the email is sent, the bill is paid, the design is exported — the screen goes away. If there’s no natural end, that’s your signal.
What’s the brain state? Focused and curious, or glazed and irritable? You’ll know the difference the moment you look at their face.
Does it lead to real-world action? “I found a cool bird on this app — let’s go look for it in the backyard!” The digital world should be a bridge, not the destination.

If it hits 3 out of 5 on the Tool side, give yourself a permission slip. If it’s all Teaser — it might be time to close the laptop and go find some real-life pinecones.

If You Want to Go Deeper

I am, at my core, a reader. So when I started thinking seriously about this topic, I went to the books. These three have shaped my thinking more than almost anything else I’ve encountered on screens and kids — and I recommend them wholeheartedly. Not to scare you, but to equip you.

Glow Kids — Nicholas Kardaras

This one is serious and worth every page. Kardaras makes a compelling, research-backed case for why screens affect developing brains differently than we might expect. It’s not alarmist — it’s honest. And honestly, it’s what first made me start asking “tool or teaser?” in the first place.

12 Ways Your Phone Is Changing You — Tony Reinke

Reinke writes from a thoughtful, faith-based perspective and asks questions I hadn’t thought to ask about my own phone habits — not just my kids’. This one is quieter and more reflective than Kardaras, and I found myself underlining almost every other page.

Reset Your Child’s Brain — Victoria L. Dunckley, MD

Dr. Dunckley is a child psychiatrist, and this book is the most practical of the three. If you’ve ever watched your child spiral after too much screen time and wondered what on earth just happened neurologically — this book will explain it clearly and give you an actual plan. Remarkable.

^{Note: These are affiliate links, which means I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. These are books I own, have actually read, and genuinely love.}

The Bottom Line

Picasso once said that art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. I think about that a lot when I watch my kids create — with paintbrushes, with clay, with a design app, with their voices. The medium matters less than the making.

Screens are not the enemy of a joyful, creative homeschool life. Mindlessness is. Passivity is. The slow drift into consumption without intention is.

But you? You are paying attention. You asked the question. You’re thinking about this! That’s huge!

That’s already half the work.

Now go subscribe to download that free printable checklist in the Resource Library, put it on your fridge, and the next time someone asks for the tablet, you’ll have the question ready. Tool or teaser?

I think you already know the answer. ✨

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homeschooling

How to Protect Your Homeschool Family Online: Simple Tools That Actually Work

January 14, 2026February 12, 2026 Jessica Lovett

^{As in all my posts, there may be affiliate links. However, ClearPlay et. all did not sponsor or pay for this post in any way – I just love the services.}

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As parents, one of our main jobs is to protect our family. We protect our kids from germs and sickness to the best of our ability by cleaning the house, teaching them to wash their hands when they get home from being out and about, teaching them about hygiene, etc. We protect them from physical dangers by telling them not to touch the stove and showing them why, by telling them not to talk to strangers, etc.

Just the basics!

One often neglected place where we don’t remember to protect our kids to the best of our abilities is online.

Why Even Good Websites Aren’t Safe

I remember going on a popular homeschool blog to load our morning time plans when the kids were little. Unbeknownst to me, it had been hacked! There were *ahem* super bad images plastered there on the page! I quickly turned it to a different tab, glad that my kids didn’t see.

Even if we are going to decidedly Good Things online, we cannot be too careful. Decidedly joy-killing stuff when we should be filling our kids with joy.

Yet, there are simple steps you can take to protect your family from things and fortify your home.

As a Millennial parent, when computers and the internet were new, it all felt innocent and exciting. Napster let you record movie quotes to play on your Tracfone answering machine to give friends a laugh! MySpace let you post silly personality quizzes to see which ‘N Sync boy you “were,” and the like. The LOLCats came around and we all hadz cheezeburgerz. We tend to see the internet as something fun, irreverent, and silly, inhabited by friendly nerds. That feeling stuck with me, rubber stamping how I feel about the internet in general, and is hard to shake sometimes.

Point being, as parents, we expect that if we teach our kids that Bad is Bad, that they will avoid it online. However, we are not counting on the fact that even if they are not actively seeking evil online, it is seeking them.

Router-Level Internet Filtering: The Protection You Actually Need

CleanBrowsing is one of the best tools out there! Many times, non-techie parents make the mistake of thinking they installed a browser extension to keep ads or junk off, so therefore they are protected. This is not the case.

Browser extensions are finicky at best and easy to remove, at worst. They get removed accidentally with updates. They turn themselves off when you need them. They don’t have the coverage you expect them to have. And, in addition, they are likely to steal your browsing data and sell it – not fun.

Plus, you forget which computers you added extension protection to… Or get a new gadget in the house and forget to sync it. Too complicated and too unreliable.

CleanBrowsing protects at the router level. For those of you who are not extreme Star Trek nerds, the internet comes into your house from an ISP (Internet Service Provider) like Suddenlink, Optimum, etc. to your modem. The modem connects to a router.

The router is like a sun that shoots sunrays of internet light to all your gadgets in the house.

CleanBrowsing acts like sunscreen, going into the router and making sure that all gadgets connected to the router get filtered even before that internet goes to your iPad, etc. It is easier to lockdown, control, monitor, and is much more simple to operate than juggling all those filters on separate gadgets.

For gadgets with data plans or hotspot capability, CleanBrowsing has an app that you can add directly to those devices to make sure they are covered with your plan on the go!

Before you worry about it, yes, they have a free plan! You can have a paid plan that is very reasonable in which you can customize things. I’ve customized blocks on various providers that like to make popup ads on our Roku, which is nice, but not super necessary.

Layering Your Family’s Online Protection

In addition to CleanBrowsing, we use Nighthawk Parental Controls on our router to control times and what gadgets are actually accessing our internet, as well as Google Family Link, for safe searching and app controls. Just for good measure, we also use Qustodio on some devices!

The main thing you should have is something like CleanBrowsing to protect not only from pornography (whether intentional or inadvertent in things like hacked sites, ads, etc.) but also just from junk hitting your computer.

The amount of random sites lagging onto your browsing would astound you. Cut those off!

Movie Filtering for Family Movie Night: VidAngel and ClearPlay

In addition to that, we use VidAngel and ClearPlay for movies. These two apps allow you to remove language, inappropriate scenes, violence, and such from movies. The cuts are at your discretion. Many times, you can’t even notice the cuts in the movies!

Some people feel that kids need to be exposed to bad language and violence in media so that they can be ready for Real Life as Adults.

I’m strongly opposed to this.

As an Adult in Real Life, I don’t go around hearing tons of cursing or having random acts of violence popping up in my path on a daily basis. Again, I don’t shop at Walmart! But… (Ok, that’s a joke…)

Besides, as adults, we cultivate the life we want to live. If your ideal life doesn’t have bad language in it, you are in charge of that. You can take steps to avoid it as much as possible.

“Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you’ve imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.”
~Henry David Thoreau

If you want a simple life surrounded by daily Bible reading and Jesus-centric music, do it. Joy will follow.

Watching movies with cursing puts the words in your brain and makes you more readily apt to use them, either verbally or in your brain. It also stunts your vocabulary and makes you sound less intelligent.

My husband and I routinely ClearPlay and VidAngel things we want to watch, even on our own. Yes, without the kids around!

Before you wonder, but why watch things that need to be censored at all – that is a fair point, but there are some amazing movies – I was a Theatre/Communication double major with English Literature and also took extensive film studies classes in grad. school, give me a break here – that are amazing art but don’t need a few extra scenes or words that are added on top for no reason.

Due to my background, I’m not talking about being Amish or prudish. I’m the first to tell you that I’d rather go without lots and lots of things then lose my Spotify plan! But, we can still control our environment in such a way as to cultivate joy in our Spirits.

Marvel movies are a great example. Iron Man is one of my favorite movies of all time and I wanted to show it to the kids. It teaches that caring about others and being self sacrificing (and being really good at science!) can help one to be a better person and beat the odds!

However, I didn’t need the random bad words and dancing bikini chicks there at the beginning, before Tony’s redemption, highlighting his bad boy-ness that he activates hero mode there near the middle of the movie. His snarkiness alone communicates that just fine without them!

And just like that, Boom, Bikini Chicks have Disappeared!

Classic films like ET have tons and tons of language – and insults that I don’t need my little parrots mimicking! You may not remember that, because if like me, you saw it on TV when they used to take these things out, but it is still an amazing movie without it. Same goes for Back to the Future.

Here is what it looks like to use Clearplay, for instance.

Then you can go more closely into the different blocked areas and see what you want exactly to block.

Yes, it bleeps out words for you, the parent! Isn’t that nice of them?! I thought so…

And for some of us, there are films we saw when we were in high school or so, that we may want to share with a spouse that are brilliant – looking at you, Wes Anderson!! – but have way too many things that we don’t want in our brains anymore. Like millions of repeated bad words, which really don’t even make sense in the context of the sentences they are used in.

My mom once told me that using the same bad word over and over again just makes you sound like you don’t have the imagination to think up a new adjective or word to use. Like, if we replaced a bad word with the word “pink” to describe a pony.

Would you sound smart if you said, “That pink pink pink pinkin’ pinkerty pinkest pink pony!!!”

Right, you would not sound smart. Case in point!

At a certain point, those things become undesirable. I used to have a giant Ignore button in my brain that things wouldn’t register. That is bad! You want your conscience to care. You don’t want to dull your senses. Now, I feel a magnetic revulsion from anything too violent or with too much language.

When my kids were little and all we watched was Mr. Rogers, Wild Kratts, the Wiggles, and the Wonder Pets, my spirit got sensitized again and I don’t want it to go back to the way it was when I was completely fine and dandy with going to Air Force One at the movie theatre as a kid.

The way to do that is to watch what you yourself watch.

How to Use VidAngel and ClearPlay

Using VidAngel or ClearPlay is easy!

VidAngel has Psych (which isn’t too violent generally but does have lots of random words popping up!) while ClearPlay has Marvel and more Disney movies.

What we do is have them on a Chrome extension and then send them to our Roku via wireless connection. We don’t have a TV, only a projector, but it is even easier to do if you have a more simple set up. Sometimes for more special effects laden movies, we hook up the HDMI to a laptop since the RAM suffers with heavy CGI.

Protecting Your Family Is Simple

You don’t need to be a tech genius to keep your family safe online. Start with router-level filtering through CleanBrowsing, add movie filtering tools like VidAngel or ClearPlay, and layer on additional parental controls as needed for your family.

The internet doesn’t have to be a scary place.

With a few simple tools, you can create a joyful, protected digital environment where your kids can learn, explore, and grow without stumbling into things that steal their innocence.

If you’d like to create a specialized plan for your home’s internet and media or need help knowing where to start or how to set it up, set up a coaching session with me! I’d love to help you in any way I can.

Christmas, Holidays, homeschooling, parenting

Our Favorite Christmas Books for Elementary Readers: Building Joyful Holiday Traditions

December 18, 2025February 12, 2026 Jessica Lovett

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There’s something magical about curling up with a good Christmas book during the holiday season. In our homeschool, we’ve built a tradition around reading quality Christmas literature together – books that capture the wonder of the season while offering rich language and beautiful illustrations.

_{This Post Contains Affiliate Links.}

Here is a picture of our Christmas books! These are the books that have earned a permanent spot on our bookshelf (pictured above!) and come out year after year. When the kids were small, I would always put them out in a basket underneath the tree to encourage magical Christmas reading time. Rereading some of these can take me back to my own childhood Christmases!

Early Elementary (K-2nd Grade)

Stranger in the Woods by Carl R. Sams II and Jean Stoick

Stranger in the Woods by Carl R. Sams II & Jean Stoick is a gorgeous “photographic fantasy” follows woodland animals as they discover a mysterious snowman in their forest. The stunning nature photography makes it feel like a nature study and a Christmas story rolled into one. Perfect for children who love animals and the beauty of winter.

Merry Christmas, Squirrel! by Nancy Rose

Speaking of woodland creatures – this delightful book features real photographs of a mischievous squirrel preparing for Christmas.

It’s adorable, funny, and amazingly well-crafted. Kids love the real animal photography combined with tiny props and sets. I love all of Nancy Rose’s books!

The Mitten adapted by Jan Brett

While not strictly a Christmas story, Jan Brett’s The Mitten is a Ukrainian folktale has become a winter/Christmas classic in many homes.

Jan Brett’s intricate illustrations are worth poring over again and again – you will find a new detail with every reading – and the cumulative tale structure makes it perfect for young readers to “read” along.

The Biggest, Most Beautiful Christmas Tree by Amye Rosenberg

This is a classic story about forest animals who work together to find the perfect Christmas tree.

The vintage illustrations and simple story make this a perfect first read-aloud for the youngest readers.

This is the perfect gift for littles from someone who wants to be the Fun Aunt, since the main character is their aunt who comes and brings Christmas to them!

Middle Elementary (3rd-4th Grade)

The Jolly Christmas Postman by Allan Ahlberg and Janet Ahlberg

“This gorgeously illustrated, full-color classic celebrates a time before email with an interactive picture book full of real letters to read aloud. The Jolly Postman brings a batch of wonderful letters for Christmas, including notes from fairy tale characters. Open this book, take out the letters, and discover what favorite characters would write to each other–and reimagine best-loved tales together.”

A Little House Christmas Treasury by Laura Ingalls Wilder

This collection pulls together all the Christmas chapters from the Little House books into one beautiful volume. If you’re already reading the Little House series, this makes a wonderful companion. The stories capture simple, pioneer Christmas celebrations that help children appreciate the true meaning of the season and understand how people celebrated with joy even with very few material possessions. Complete with Garth Williams’s beloved illustrations!

Snowflake Bentley by Jacqueline Briggs Martin

This Caldecott Medal winner tells the true story of Wilson Bentley, the man who first photographed snowflakes and proved that no two are alike. It’s a beautiful blend of science, biography, and winter wonder. Perfect for nature study during the Christmas season.

More Christmas Book Recommendations

The Nutcracker by E.T.A. Hoffmann (various editions)

The original story that inspired the ballet! We have many different editions but I really want this copy. It has audio and tells the story of the orchestra! You can push the button on each beautiful scene to hear the vivid sound of an orchestra playing from Tchaikovsky’s score.

The Berenstain Bears and the Joy of Giving: The True Meaning of Christmas by by Jan Berenstain and Mike Berenstain

“Join Brother and Sister Bear at the Christmas Eve pageant as they witness the very first Christmas, and make an important discovery about giving and receiving, a valuable lesson during the holiday season and year around. Young readers will learn the true meaning of Christmas in this addition to The Berenstain Bears Living Lights™ series.”

Christmas Activity Books

My kids (and myself, really!) have always adored the Usborne Dolly Sticker books as well as Magic Painting books! These activity books will give you valuable minutes to get things done, like wrapping gifts, and give your kids something magical to do that is edifying and not just busywork!

Sticker Dolly Dressing The Nutcracker: A Magical Interactive Sticker Adaptation of the Classic Wintertime Ballet

“Use the stickers to dress the doll characters in this exciting version of the The Nutcracker ballet. Clara’s uncle gives her a wooden nutcracker doll for Christmas, which, after a battle with the evil Mouse King, transforms into a real-life prince. Clara and the prince travel through a forest, filled with twirling snowflakes, before arriving the kingdom of the Sugar Plum Fairy, where trees are made of candy floss, cupcakes and candy canes. Clara eventually returns home. Has her experience been real or is it all an amazing dream?”

Sticker Dolly Dressing Christmas: A Festive Christmas Dress-Up Adventure with Glamorous Balls, Ice Skating, Ballet, Carriage Rides and More

“Dress up the dolls for the festive season with a range of colorful outfits!

Scenes include a glamorous masked ball, an ice skating adventure, a trip to the ballet, a magical carriage ride and lots more Christmassy activities.

With hundreds of stickers of dresses, cosy coats, beautifully-wrapped gifts, ice skates and tutus to get the dolls ready for the festive season.”

Enchanted Christmas Magic Painting Book

Magic painting books are no normal paint with water books, with lackluster illustrations and weak colors. These are absolutely beautiful with artful settings like sunsets, beautiful forests, and more. I absolutely love all of these books and can never get enough of them! Plus, the paint doesn’t get messy because you are *only* using water, not the palette style of books. It is easier and more fun at the same time.

Bring the magic of Christmas to life in this adorable interactive activity book!

Winter Wonderland Magic Painting Book: A Winter and Holiday Book for Kids – A Mess-Free Festive Activity with Water-Activated Unicorns and Northern Lights for Children

“Filled with wintry whimsy, from ice-skating unicorns to snow castles, northern lights and other fantastical delights. Use the brush provided to sweep water over the designs and festive colors magically appear!

A mess-free way to keep children busy for long winter nights and for the holidays. Simply tuck the waterproof back flap under each page as it’s painted, to stop water from seeping through to the rest of the book.”

Notebook Doodles Christmas: Coloring & Activity Book (Design Originals) 32 Festive Designs of Reindeer, Penguins, Gifts, Snowflakes, Stockings, Trees, Treats, and More, on Perforated Paper

“This fun and engaging coloring book for ‘tweens is filled with 32 festive designs of charming Christmas scenes, reindeer, penguins, presents, snowflakes, stockings, trees, animals, and so much more, from talented artist Jess Volinski.

Along with uplifting creative art activities for young girls and fill-in prompts with inspirational hand-lettered sentiments, Jess also includes instructions on basic coloring techniques, fully colored examples, and motivational quotes to go with every design.”

Building Your Own Christmas Reading Tradition

In our home, we keep all our Christmas books together on a special shelf. On December 1st, we bring them out and they become part of our daily rhythm throughout the Advent season. Some families like to wrap Christmas books and unwrap one each night. Others create a Christmas book advent calendar.

However you choose to incorporate these books, the key is consistency. When children know that certain books appear every December, they begin to associate those stories with the warmth and joy of the season. These books become part of your family’s story.

Looking for more book recommendations? Subscribe to my email list for monthly resources, suggestions, homeschool encouragement, and free printables like our recent Themed Stocking Stuffer Guide to help make every Christmas stand out in memory! The first one in the series focuses on Jane Austen ideas!